Well, well, well—here I am again, sick. This time it’s at 15 weeks, which is maybe better than 6 weeks… the jury is out there. I have another upper respiratory infection, and have been pretty much down for the count since Wednesday. How I miss sweet Nyquil. I really, really do. This time, my cold has morphed into a really gross cough. I woke up this morning thinking maybe I was better, but then I started hacking worse than yesterday, and realized that my fleeting hope was just an empty desire, and that I was back into feeling like crud for another day. It’s really cramping my style.
In pregnancy news—I had a dream I felt movement, which was such a great dream. I was super bummed to wake up and find out that no, it was just a dream. Oh, poor psyche. My nausea is still holding on but I am feeling like it’s about to round a corner—it’s just as persistent, but not as intense, so that seems like a plus! I think that I’m also losing the last bit of bloat and that my bump is becoming an authentic baby bump. Sooo cute.
I have intense gender anxiety and several times have thought about shelling out the $135 to get one of those boutique places to put me out of my misery and tell me if we are having a boy or a girl. To quell this desire, I’ve been obsessively seeking out items for the nursery—I feel like for some reason I have to have my boy v. girl selections (which I know is silly, since my nursery options are pretty neutral either way) but now that I’m nearly 4 months in, I start to feel like all the sudden I need to get serious about making some decisions or something. I think my pressure comes from knowing that once March hits and wedding season really swings into full gear, I won’t have time to deliberate and agonize over every little detail because I’ll be working so much, and I already know how working exhausts me to no end.
In exhaustion news, I’ve also made the tough decision that I am not going to take any more weddings before my due date. This is hard for me because I want the $$, but I just know that I really physically can’t take any more work and manage to deal with it emotionally, physically, and mentally. I didn’t want to make that choice, honestly, but seeing how devastated I was physically after last week (and then picked up a cold) it made me see how vulnerable I am now and that is no good for le bebe.
Well, that’s all for this week. I need to do a quick growth update and I promise to do so this weekend sometime. Thanks for reading!