Motherhood · Uncategorized

Milestone: 6 months breastfeeding

When I was pregnant, I had a lot of goals. One — and perhaps one of the most important — was breastfeeding. I knew I wanted to make a commitment to being a breastfeeding mom. I went to a class. I read books. I felt prepared and empowered and ready to commit to having the special bond with my child of being the sole provider of her nutrients.

When she was born, she went Right to my breast and suckled. I felt so awesome, like I passed some incredible mom test. I won. My kid latched! She fed from me. The lactation consultants came and helped
Us achieve an even better latch. She squeezed my breast and out came the honey colored colostrum, the liquid gold that my baby craved and needed. She nursed constantly those first few days, and the doctors and nurses all applauded her. We were making our way! We were being a perfect little
Family!

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We were discharged and everything changed. She cried and cried. She suckled for hours but nothing would console her. We desperately watched the Happiest Baby on the Block and we tried to shush and swaddle and swing. And then my husband noticed that she seemed warm. We took her
temperature— it was 101 degrees.

We freaked out. I called the answering service at the pediatrician and left a message every hour on the hour until finally she fell asleep for 2 hours in sheer exhaustion. We didn’t know we should have taken her to the hospital. The pediatrician didn’t call us back. I cried. She cried. It was the worst night of my life.

The following morning, we took her to the doctor (there had been a problem with the answering service– they were deeply sorry). The on call doctor told us that since leaving the hospital, Emmaline had lost 1/2 a pound— and that he suspected that she was hungry. Starving, actually.

He gave her formula and took her bloodwork and she ate that formula like a baby that had never once eaten. And I cried and cried, because I felt like a failure: why wasn’t I able to give my child the one thing she needed and wanted?

So, we entered into a tenuous relationship where we had to supplement with formula. My milk came in, but it still wasn’t enough. And thus, I started on every supplement combination you could imagine to get my supply where it was enough to feed her. I tried power pumping. I tried pumping after every meal. I started Mother’s Milk Tea. Fenugreek. Lactation cookies. Here’s my recipe of what worked for me:

Fenugreek, 610 mg 3 tablets twice a day

Blessed thistle, 3 tablets twice a day

3-5 cups of mothers milk tea

Vitanica nursing blend– 1
Per day

Nursing vitamins — 1 per day

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